LET HER KNOW

In the world of friendship everyone was busy with the different companies; one was busy to be with the friends for the friendship so another was busy to be with friendship for the friends. Society was busy to solve the gender based problems in the world of friendship. People were so kind to make friendships but except one; Mr. Bruce Wane. He was so shy to be with the outside world, he were having no friends in his whole life, was to live with his own world’s imaginations. Tonight, at ten(PM) I was supposed to walk in the society park, I was unable to stay on the track for more rounds as I was suffered from 4km track towards the park from my home. So I set on the track next to Mr. Wane; you know what happened; wait first make yourself easy this good news sorry; news is so shocking. Mr. Wane was talking to himself in his own lyrics, but the shocking is that how I can understand his lyrics; because the tunes were same. Mr. Wane first started as I sat next to him……….. !

No one is with you in this world, wane……..

So I was so quires that what is going on in his mind; sorry head; whatever. So when I came to know that tonight he is here because he lost his friend. He was with another kind of lyrics, but somehow I was able to understand his lyrics in the tunes.

Mr. Wane said, ‘Let her know’ that what she lost tonight; I was with her because I needs her and she needs me but she doesn’t needs me anymore cause she has a next level of attitude; in friendship there is no attitude, I just told her that she is my only ‘Pain killer’.

Mr. Wane in his lyrics; you know what happened she shouted on me and said that I’m your  ‘Pain Killer’; only, so I told that yes you are my only pain killer afterwards she said that I’m done with you, you are no more in my life. She was on her track and I was on my track.

Stop right there! Mr. Wane is talking about his own track not our park’s one. Mr. Wane remains Silent! Silent! After his breakup with her friend and started again with the same lyrics of the same tunes.

Mr. Wane! ….. , I was with her because she is my real pain killer but she didn’t get the point; she always stay negative- in the positive manner “in her words”, he said. I was alone and will stay alone till my last breath. I used the word pain killer because before her I was as I am right now, no one cares about me and no one cared. My Dad! He was busy from my birth day. Dad was so busy in the outside stuffs and he was unable to give me time. He once in the evening time came back from the office and start arguments with mom, mom was not cruel and she is not cruel; I don’t know what she is, but at least I can say that she was so emotional……so after the arguments with dad she came into my room and start betting me, sometimes her behavior was so psychopathic for me because the way she beat me with another kind of instruments, so I was terrified and once became so rigid and pick a gun from dad’s room and pointed straight towards  her I was so terrified that what I am gonna do right now; I was out of my mind as more was not possible to control over the violence, she then came upstairs as I run upstairs, with a block and that block was on my mind from the next downward upstairs straight to emergency back door. I leaved and was outside for an eight hours, I was so shocked and out of mind but no one was there to handle me; I was in the ground for three hours then I walk straight to the back; football ground for rest of my time to spend. From the day I’m traumatized due to that unrest in my life. I was seven when this happened.

Mr. Wane stopped for a while…., and I was so curious that what would be he did next….. And was so in think thought stage that what kind of mom he has, then Mr. Wane started again……

“My Mom was so cruel towards me rather than others, still I don’t remember her caring memories for which every child in this world strives, and my dad even didn’t ask me that what is happening with you but he bet me too due to their arguments at the time. From the day; I was traumatized and I was unable to tell mummy’ ‘mummy every night in my nightmare I saw you with next of arguments with dad; then you came up with the new instrument and bet me with’. Let this by gone story by gone, but I still unable to tell my friend as same I was unable to tell my mom; and this why I said pain killer due to this kind of stress, she was the only one; at least  feel my feelings as the others cannot.

I leave at the time as the story was so stressful and so tariffing I was not able to hear his story furthermore, so I leave……. But one day I will complete this story by a proper meeting with Mr. Wane and his imagined world for the purpose of being a permanent pain killer to complete the story so that he cannot feel himself alone and at least he will have the pages with his story but might support him in this kind of situation.

The Reunion; Past of the glorified pain. Tonight the intense desire of my writing wisdom attracted me to complete the story. The reunion story starts when I was on the brink of starvation to meet Mr. Wane, I was unable to reach out for the past ten weeks to ask “Mr. Wane, how he would be”. I found his Guest House, and went there the beauty of walls reflected the rare peace of mind. The Gloom garden with shinning flowers illuminated the chronology of the painful characters. When I entered the lawns door I found Mr. Wane is next to the piano with agony of Drinks and Smoke. He then “Have a seat Miss. Tania’

We discussed a lot of right there but reaching to the painful story of his life, which started with some silent secrets. I found that Mr. Wane was enjoying his pain. He was arguing that “pain is everything” it’s a glory of life. Life has death which had glamourized, where you live like an echo, the standards reverberates the reality finding peace then becomes the frequency of that glamourized life. Many people try to achieve standards where they neglect their morality. Materialism caught them for the lavish morality where they have comfort zones to define their own moral values which had no value in humanity. Afterwards pain becomes the harsh reality of that side. Pain then decides your life to the tears which never contemplate your agony. Likewise its simple, when you have tears on your chin it’s just emotion over authenticity, this state is like a day night agony. In which morning light turn your head towards the death, the stand out night then appeals you towards the agony which is your peace but not humanity’s. The pre dominancy of humanity over death will change your perceptivity that it’s only the graveyard which heals the valley of death whereas the death has to be achieved. And death is impossible in the exceptional cases, like there is only way which is called ‘Suicide’

Well, Mr. Wane you are quite simple and optimistic in your views, “What about this Drink and that Segar” like this describes the comfort zone as you discussed as a lavish morality in your ‘Views’ Right!

Yeah you are right as same I’m in your views you are in my views. But Miss. Tania this is a kind of dilemma of conceptions, like you had answered this in your questioning.

Well, it’s the way of rhetoric, I reapplied.

“Yes, pessimism isn’t the part of rhetoric’s world, as life has no lavish morality. Coming to the out stands this bottle and that cover, doesn’t define these things, if these are drugs or not but this liquid and that tobacco inside defines the druggisim. In the same manifesto life has morality but the ideology of morality defines what moralities are!

Pain is reality in which humans to be frank are my enemies, like they always ruined my pain for which my eyes bleed for a long time.

Humans are like their lavish morality which will divert you from real meaning. There is meaning of everything! Everything! We have except human. Whereas morality had given it a value that’s why it is called humanity, we only degrade it when we have lavish morality cause in lavish morality we always interpret the existential theory to a meaningless life.

As the Albert Camus, he had a lavish morality, whereas he is quite simple and right, maybe pessimistic too, but, his argumenta state of mind hadn’t given him an opportunity to search for the meaning of life. I think that in these cases you have only pain which can give an opportunity to search for the meaning of life.

So what is your wisdom of pain, I asked.

It’s like in the darkness you beg for the light but darkness will decide your tears. Although the memories you had, will accompany you but the hope for something will ruin your company not the pain but company.

So it’s mean not be hopeful, I asked.

No it’s not but at least not in pain, enjoys your pain always. The silence will shape your peace. It’s quite simple then; the peace afterwards will tell you everything, belief, trust, loyalty and whatever we have, will be answered by that peace, which has pain, ultimately.

So here we go for the pain, I answered.

Of course, you see this piano which might represent my agony, the tune describes this is an art which belongs to humans, untimely my agony, you may assume, the lyrics make it different from other, this is why it is called piano not a violin.

So what are your thoughts on this, Mr. Wane?

Well Tania, it’s that the pain provides the wisdom of peace, the silence shapes that peace and the lyrics will hit the same but not the tune, where there will be no one who will feel the same. That’s why for emotional wellbeing tears are important or you are gonna fail in that Ahh! (Mr. Wane laughed)

My love this valley is full of lyrics but painful, here we have no greed for any peace but for the pain only.

We then went to the dining hall as the time was ticking towards the twin light era of dinner. Table with white sheet having plates on, the knives were flashy where I did seen the real picturization of evilsism. The folks were supporting the ego of knives to shape the evilsism on the table. Well the meat reflected the butchery. I enjoyed the dinner it was just the hard philosophy of Mr. Wane which dragged me towards this kind of statements. Literally I was traumatized at the time.

I then asked, “what if your feelings are uncertain Mr. Wane”

“No! Miss. Tania, the scenes become unforeseen in the foreseen state when you become uncertain not your feelings’’, wholly shit, in this modern era everything is figured out with a single superficial thing. Look, life, is figuring out word, in life you have to invest in different sides but unfortunately everything is then given to life. Even if you have good romantic life with your partner and facing a sexual problems your life is incomplete, your investment always portray your life if you don’t have investment for romantic life so you have an incomplete life.

What is life? What you have is life. What a Good is what you is a good life. Under this single word you have family life, romance life, couple life and sex life etc. It’s a kind of chain you are working on. Suppose you have sex life then why you are looking for Romantic one because it’s the life which is providing the romanticism. You always tilt to invest in life only if you have problems in sexual life, romantic life but will still invest in one thing which is life. You are ignoring other’s rights at the time of investment, after all your sexual life becomes a frustrated sexual problem under the observation of life. You did given rise to an evils where the devils doesn’t exists but only the suffered one, Mr. Wane then stay silent for a while!!

Mr. Wane you did elaborated the evilism world but without devils evils world doesn’t exists, its incomplete than.

Miss. Tania this is where the statement “Society shapes the people’ arises.”

I enjoy my pain because the reality is; no one is there for you who will at least try to understand you. Even without pain cure has no value. You would be wondering that it’s your dependency, but, no it’s not, in this modern era humans are more tilted to dependency. Even without human body suicide doesn’t exists. What if we had souls in this world, only? Then it would be the real fictional world which we will be having. It’s the Ego we have, shaping the ego under the evilsism. My pain is so enjoyable. The darkness wow! It’s so obsessed to the pain. The pain I have is so beautiful, like a moment where I can imagine my real life. In the death sawn my pain glooms after all. Without this I’m impure. The tears which met my lips meant something which I can’t explain right here, it hits differently. The empty heart wow!

It’s like a death valley where death means to me. When I left myself for starvation to my own tears, when there is nothing left in the Death Valley, I start dyeing for it, means to me something.

Well, I don’t want to be an evil but without this devilism I feel incomplete and impure. I know that human and a devil doesn’t make any sense but the intensity of the devilism I have, starves for death.

“This is how villains are made!”

It’s time to put my pain on, this is how villains are made, Miss. Tania, Mr. Wane said.

So what do you do for your psychache, I asked Mr. Wane.

Miss. Tania I enjoy my pain by different ways, you would be wondering if I am psycho you might be right, whoever did this before me was having suicidal thoughts, after all, right!

Yes, I replied.

Yeah I had many suicidal thoughts even right now in front of you I am in those thoughts.

I am really sorry Mr. Wane to hear that, I replied.

No, Miss. Tania, It’s all what we have to face after psychache, right!

Yeah of course I replied.

So don’t be sorry any more, Mr. Wane Replied!

I leave the guest house after all as Mr. Wane was supposed to stay in Solitariness for some time.

While leaving I did realized many things but I was wonder that if there could be anything left which is not included in the story. Nothing except me was left there; I was so obsessed to Mr. Wane pain, I by myself also beg for that world. As I leave the guest house I got a trauma which was my past sexual abuse by my colleague. “It was a dark hidden car beside the basement of my office; this trauma wasn’t due to Mr. Wane his pain which triggered it to a high risky trauma, while it was the car which passed by the guest house same to the dark one’

After all a year late when I went back from my business trip I heard that Mr. Wane took his own life.

I went to the guest house after this shocking news but there was no one except me who could answer my Questions. By any chance I found that an officer is passing by the guest house. I run to stop him if he could tell something about this, but unfortunately neither he nor I was able to answer those questions which were to be.

The officer told that maybe the Forensic Science office could help out because they are caring Mr. Wane Suicide note.

I was so desperate to reach out for the note, but though there was no one who could help me out of this trauma after trauma. However for some days I worried but curiously I got that suicide note.

The Suicide Note;

“I am writing this note to inform the world so they couldn’t worry about two deaths.

Dad, I am really sorry you are gonna lose your partner, I can only be healed with mom’s death but it is not possible except killing her. I killed your partner with a blade carrying Jews so that she could feel that pain, but yet it wasn’t enough, I carried a lush blade so that I can cut her intestine out of her body and hang her with, the pain was enjoyable though. I remember her voice and hear that screaming repeatedly for five days. The way she begged to let her go to die simply in one shot peacefully, but yet it wasn’t enough, she is gonna remember her pain after death even. I did enjoy her screaming for five days, but when I woke up it was the day dream I were having.

Please forgive me and don’t let her know that I am dying owing to the fact that she was the reason. I am gonna take my life as same as I saw my mom in the day dream.

My last words for my mom; Mom everything is gonna be okay one day, this is not the first time you in my dreams, I am having these since three years, there are a lot which I wrote in my diary in the drawer but please don’t let her to read, dad!

I know that this shit in my head is of mind but don’t worry I am gonna fixed it, by a blade having Jews scratching myself with it and dying peacefully with these shit traumas. I still love you but one thing to listen me carefully even if I am your little son, “A Mom can build a home and can destroy it by these single statements “Wane it’s gonna be alright I love you honey”, you are my sweet heart don’t worry dad is here with us but son you are only hero you are gonna protect us, you are the only who can protect his mother, A Mom who kiss her family on the bow, foreheads to live peacefully.

Hey police man if you are reading this I know you will be the first reader so don’t let mom to read this.

Mom; I wish you could’ve lost your memories, I am not a beautiful pain anymore but a painful memory for the life time.”

I am ending this story with my life, my suicide note is this story and this statement, “we are not humans, anymore” My reply to Mr. Wane.

We’re proud to announce the release of a powerful new article on The Diary of Ahsan:

👉 Why Pain Can Be the Loudest Silence: Lessons from Mr. Wane’s Story

This article is more than a reflection—it’s a call for compassion. Inspired by Mr. Wane’s Story, it explores the hidden realities of trauma, loneliness, and suicide, showing how pain often hides behind silence.

Read the full article to understand why listening, empathy, and simple human connection might be the difference between life and death for someone in pain.

Let Her Know

A haunting, philosophical exploration of loneliness and trauma. This post tells the tragic story of Mr. Wane—a man whose painful childhood and broken friendships led him to romanticize pain itself. Seen through the perspective of Miss Tania, the narrative uncovers Wane’s descent into suicidal thoughts and his eventual death. It is a devastating study of how unresolved pain, childhood abuse, and isolation can turn into mental illness and tragic endings.

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This deeply unsettling story revolves around Mr. Wane, a lonely and traumatized man whose life was shaped by childhood abuse, emotional neglect, and a failed friendship that he considered his only escape. Through the eyes of Miss Tania, a listener drawn to his pain, readers are taken into Mr. Wane’s philosophical reflections about life, pain, morality, and human nature. The narrative exposes how trauma spirals into suicidal thoughts and eventually, tragic action. His eventual suicide, and the dark contents of his final note, reveal the scars left by a childhood devoid of love, a mind consumed by psychache, and a heart starved of connection.